Thursday, August 22, 2013

Small town, Mississippi, you did me a service!

    ... because I'm gonna have some great stories to tell! Living in small town Mississippi, was like living in another world! I have never lived in the south. Not at all.  I am 1/4 hillbilly on my mom's side, which is why I always walk around barefoot, but I still had no idea what I was getting in to moving down there!
    Let's talk about some of the miscommunication going on! First off, I couldn't understand anything anyone was sayin'. And they couldn't understand me!! That's gonna lead to some miscommunication for sure!  I noticed one right away when I went through the Wendy's drive thru on one of my first few days in town.  In the south, people don't like to be usin' all kinds of words to communicate. Well, sometimes they do, sometimes they don't, but when it comes to asking someone to repeat themselves, because you didn't hear them or understand what they were saying, they don't.  They will use all kinds of words when they get up in your face about something! But that's another story for another time!
    So, Wendy's drive thru... as if a drive thru window isn't hard enough on the understanding. Well, if they don't understand you there, they use ONE word: "Ma'am!"  That's it.  And it's not even said in a way that makes you think it's even a question.  "Ma'am!" Kind of yelled and a little bit of annoyance in your tone of voice.  Well, I had absolutely NO idea that saying "Ma'am" meant I was supposed to repeat myself.  I figured it meant that they were trying to get my attention so they could say something else to me.  So, in the drive thru, for probably close to two or three months, I would say, "Yes?" Or "What?" when they said, "Ma'am".  Now, what would a normal person do If they weren't getting the response they anticipated with the "question" they were asking?  Most people would phrase it differently. But not people in that small town!! They just get annoyed, and say "Ma'am!!!" even louder!  My response was always the same, as the first.... "Yes!? What!! What do you need?"  Usually this would go on for a few minutes before the person would finally say something like, "I'm gonna need you to repeat that!"  Then I would.  I honestly did not have a CLUE why everyone kept saying "Ma'am" to me.  And honestly, what's with the "Ma'am", now that you mention it!!? I hate being called "Ma'am".  It just isn't my thing! I know there in the south it is supposed to be a respectful way of addressing someone, but if the tone of voice is angry, what difference does it make what the actual WORDS are!?

Far away in dream land!


     Huh!? That's funny! I just had the weirdest dream!! I dreamt I was living this crazy life with my three kids and a workaholic husband.  I moved six times in three years, across three states. Some of that time I was living in a strange far off land where people still wrote checks for their groceries and the "cool kids" had pagers. Almost two of those three years I was living with family members, including my in-laws, parents, and twice with grandparents.  Over a year and a half of that three years I had no computer, dishwasher, microwave, or any windows in my apartment. It was truly a nightmare! I was "home schooling" my kids, had a broken foot, sprained ankle, torn rotator cuff, and a torn tendon in each ankle. (BUT NO MIGRAINES!!)
     I wish I COULD say that the past few years were just a dream. But I can't. But at least by posting a little about it on my "humor blog" I am attempting to find the funny in it! I'm sure, one day, I will look back on this time in my life and just laugh and laugh and laugh! :) Now that we are all settled back in a house of our own, and the kids are all back in a real school, (sorry all you home-school moms...I don't know how you do it!), and things are starting to be more "normal", whatever that means, I am ready to try to laugh more. Wish me luck.  I think I forgot how!